You Are My Sunshine
by formerlyknownasone
Summary: You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray .You'll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away... A really sad KBOW. Read and Review.


**Okay this KBOW is a bit different from usual... But hope you guys like it anyway!!!! Rather sad...**

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You are My Sunshine**

I remember when you were first born. I was only three years old then, so young, so small, nothing like the six foot I am now. My mother was dragging me to the hospital, eager to see her best friend again. They clung onto each other's hand, my mother and yours, both crying and smiling at the same time. And there, in your dear mother's embrace, nestled this bundle on cloth, and all the curiosity in me could not stop me from wanting to take a look at what it held within. It was only then I took the slightest peek... And I saw you.

People say that love at first sight was impossible, that it will never be true. Yet, I prove them wrong.

You were only this little mite when I saw you. So small and tiny, you look exactly what you were- a baby. You had been dozing , sleeping in that really cute manner, making a small bundle of yourself while you were being cradled in your mum's arms. And then, suddenly, as if you realize I was watching, you broke into a gummy smile and opened your eyes, and I was lost in two beautiful sparkling pools of green.

I was mesmerized. They were so, so beautiful

Right then I couldn't help but smile widely. You looked so innocent, so adorable and serene, like the perfect angel you are. Even then you were so pretty, and all that I wanted to do was pinch those little cheeks of yours. Till now, I still don't understand how they could be so rosy.

I knew right then I love you, because the minute you stepped into my life, the whole world seemed to change. It was not longer just dull, and boring, but suddenly there was this burst of brilliance and colours. Warmth started flowing into me, and I was no longer cold. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.

Nothing faded as the years passed. Even when we first started school, you were still that bubbly, sunshiny Katie that I fell in love with, the one that captivated me with her dazzling smile and enchanting green eyes. Really, you were that bright sparkle, that sunshine in my life, for you never fail to bring that uncontrollable grin to my face. You lost none of that radiance and brightness that you possess even as you grew up. You were my lovely, innocent Katie, and even as I was that young awkward little kid I wanted to make sure I was there to protect you.

Protect you I did, for you needed it. You were so pretty, so lovely, of course it was natural that the boys will flock to you. Katie, you never realised how beautiful you were, but the guys in school sure did. So many people fighting for you, overwhelming you, you were so scared and helpless.

It was my duty to fight for you, to fend for you. I was the first to realise how beautiful you were, I was the first to fall in love with you. In my devoted mind I claim the honor, at least, to defend you from them. You were this pretty young thing, still so small and tiny, like when I first saw you. I had the right to fight for you, to protect my sunshine, to protect that one bright spot in my life. I love you, and this was the only thing I could do then.

Because I had to make sure no one took away that sunshine in my life.

I was your best friend, and I thought that was all I could be. I was contented and happy enough just to love you from far, admiring those lovely eyes of yours. I didn't think I could play the role of knight of shining armour, for, in my mind, I was not worthy of you. But then, I never thought those who crowded around you were fit to fill that position too. My sunshine was simply too precious and good for anybody, anyone.

I never did stop loving you, or even try to stop. I knew it would be a futile effort, it would be asking me to stop living. I simply hoped to keep our happy friendship and childishly hide my love away. I hidden it too well from you perhaps, but everyone saw right through me. But you didn't, and imagine the surprise and joy I felt when you confessed you were in love with me.

Who knew that the many summer days we spent as kids were not just filled with ice cream and laughter, but with many unwritten feelings? Who knew that beneath that golden head of yours you were thinking of me? Who knew that Katie, my Katie, was in love with me?

Your confession had been blunt, short, and unexpected. It was raining, on a weekday Potions class, something terribly unromantic. You were sullen, terribly quiet, and the smile I love was not there on your face. This was not at all like you, and I had to find out why, it drove me crazy. Suddenly there was a crash of glass phials and you blurt it all out, right there in the dungeon as you spilled your potion on the floor. That you couldn't stop thinking about me.

It was the most joyful day of my life.

Needless to say, everything clear up after that. It was sunshine after rain. True, we both received detention and made a terrible fool out of ourselves and it continued to rain, but it was all worth it. We were finally together, and best of all, you were once again smiling. Your smile, like it did the first time I met you, made me smile too. That instant I knew you were that special light of mine I always lacked... That little sunshine that brightened up my day.

The one that makes me happy even when the skies are grey.

We spent many a day blissful after that. Strolling by the lake, holding hands, standing in the moonlight... as long as we were together. Even after we left school, things remained the same. You were as sprightly as ever, and I was faithful to you as before. Nothing could separate the two of us. Nothing.

We stayed together in the same house, and I came to love all your little quirks and habits. I love how you always scold me for misplacing my Quidditch magazines, although you remind me a thousand times to pick them up from the floor. I love to wake up to the smell of those delicious blueberry pancakes you make in the morning, just to lure me out of bed. I love the faint smell of the perfume you put on everyday just to please me, the one that smelt like fresh apples and vanilla. I love how only I can feel the softness of your lips as you kiss me. I love how I can just sleep beside you and do nothing but just looking at you. I love everything about you.

I realised I couldn't live without you.

It wasn't a rash decision when I asked you to marry me, even though you said yes right away. Many people said we were too young, it had barely been a year since we graduated. But we loved each other truly, and that was enough. I have loved you for fourteen years of my life, long enough for me to realise I cannot do without you. That was all that mattered.

So we married, and you became my one and only beloved wife. My wife- the place that could only be filled by you.

It wasn't long before you told me you were pregnant, and I was ecstatic. I didn't think it was possible, but you grew even more beautiful, more lovely than ever when you were carrying our child. There was something so tender and soft about you then. I love you so much, and I don't think you know it, but having a child with you was the probably the best thing I did in my life. I was so excited, I kept babbling and went over-concern all the time, fussing over you. Everyone thought it was cute, and you didn't mind, but it was my way of showing how much I love you. You are my sunshine, and to me you deserved the best of everything.

Even after our child was born.

Cammy, we called her, our little daughter. The day she was born was almost exactly like when I first met you. She too, was a tiny little mite, barely visible from the bundles of cloth she was in. She even slept like you, cradled preciously in your arms as you beamed at her, tired but so happy. She had my eyes, my smile, my ears, and you were fond of saying she would be a daddy's girl. You were so cute when you were utterly jealous about that fact that she did not resemble her as much as I did. Yet, despite all your whinings, I knew she would grow up to be as stunning as her mother, for she had your disposition.

I told you it was unfair how to only have one daughter, and your eyes sparkled as you promised that a son would be next. I waited to be a father again, but that day never came. You never kept your promise. Instead of giving me the dream I cherished, you slipped away quietly in your sleep, and left me and our daughter without you.

And now, you lay as if in deep sleep, dressed in a pale robe, your hands clutching white roses, waiting to vanish below into that evergreen grass, and leave us forever.

How I had prayed this for not for real and pleaded to God not to take my sunshine away from me.

You never did intend to tell us you were sick were you? You thought that the truth would hurt me, didn't you, and you were right. It cut me a lot, to lose you to a battle I couldn't help with, a fight that you had to stand by yourself. Now, you are gone, and I am left here alone, heartbroken, lonely and in so much pain. I was full of regrets.

I never did get a last chance to tell how much I love you.

It's been less than a week since I lost you, but it felt like so many years. We are at your funeral now, and there you lay so still in your casket, your eyes closed, your lips pressed together, cold. Even in your death you were still so cruel to deprive me of the two things I loved most about you-- your beautiful green eyes and that amazing smile of yours. I don't understand how you could bear to leave me alone, not even to say farewell one last time.

And what about our daughter? Cammy. She is here, beside your grave with me. How could you bear to leave us both, when she is still so young. She is barely two years old, still so new to the world, and the only feature of hers that resemble you is her golden little head. You didn't even give her your lovely green eyes I love so much. It's as if you want to vanish without a trace, and leave nothing about you behind for me.

And me. I am your husband, your partner, the father of your child. You are my wife, the mother of my child. I loved you so patiently all these years, and yet you just abandoned me in this world that will cease to exist without you.

How can you.

Last night I saw you in my dreams again. You were there, smiling, telling me it would be all right. Oh Katie you gave me a soft kiss and hugged me, telling me you will never leave me again. You comforted me, smiling, saying everything was okay. I wrapped you in my arms tightly, afraid to lose you, and then the next day I woke up.

Our bed was empty except for me.

It had all been a dream, so real, yet it was only a dream. I cried.

I no longer wake up to see you sleeping next to me, staring at you while you breathe in and out so peacefully. With your silhouette missing, the bed just feels empty and cold. The smell of you on your creased pillow is fading away, and I can no longer inhale that sweet scent of yours like before. I no longer wake up to see you making blueberry pancakes in the morning, and how I miss the way you drag me awake for breakfast. Your voice no longer rings from the kitchen, and the house is dead quiet. Somehow the touch of your lips is no longer familiar anymore, and I can't feel the softness of it. The smell of your favourite perfume barely linger on your clothes inside the closet anymore. The magazines still lie cluttered all around the floor, because you aren't here to remind me to pick them up anymore.

You left me cluttered as well.

At nights I lie awake, trying to recall your special smile. The small dimples that dance around, how the the corners of your mouth just lift up so naturally. Your features lighten up, and your face would be unusually bright. Every of your smile was warm, kind and genuine, and I remember every single one you bestow. They were my sunshine.

Then I remember that I am alone on the bed, and I would longer see those smiles again. My sunshine is gone, and I know nothing I do will bring it back to me. I would then just cry and cry, hoping to forget and cry myself to sleep... Again before I dream of you.And then I cry again.

I told you I love you, though I never had the chance to tell you how much I did, and you will never know now. I tried so hard to protect my sunshine from getting stolen, but in the end, God never listen and just took my sunshine away. Just like that

You left me, without a goodbye, and the light in my world starts to fade. It is no longer brilliant, but dull and uneventful. There were no warmth or colours left in them, and there never will be anymore. My world became cold, alone, and empty without you. I will never be happy, because you are my sunshine. Once my sunshine fades, so will I, for I don't know how to live without you.

You are my sunshine, my only sunshine.

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You are my sunshine, my only sunshine  
You make me happy when skies are gray  
You'll never know dear, how much I love you  
Please don't take my sunshine away_

_The other night dear, as I lay sleeping  
I dreamed I held you in my arms  
But when I awoke, dear, I was mistaken  
So I hung my head and I cried._

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**I thought some of the lines of that song really fit well and its really sad... Well did you like it? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! **


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